What does assurance look like for the Christian when so much in this world feels uncertain?

As young men, Charles and John Wesley found their assurance in maintaining a holy life.  Through the Holy Club at Oxford, they made a practice of working out their salvation, of moving on to perfection.  At this time, Charles would describe his hope for salvation this way: “Because I have used my best endeavors to serve God.” While they preached Christian perfection, John himself was growing suspicious about his own regimen, and was even intentionally slacking off on the fasting on purpose.  On their missionary journey to Georgia, the Wesley Bros faced their own mortality for the first time, and this event that shook their concept of assurance.  Because, frankly, they were scared to death of death.

On their five month sailing journey to America, one particular storm left everyone aboard thinking they would surely drown at sea.  The British, including John and Charles, let aloud terrible screams as the mainsail tore from the severity of the tempest.  But the German Moravians on board continued to sing the psalms instead of panicking.  Afterwards, John asked them to explain and was startled that none of them, not even their women and children, were afraid to die in that storm.

A key Moravian missionary, August Spangenberg, challenged John and Charles to think differently about faith, moving it from the head to the heart.  Spangenberg asked John, “Does the Spirit of God bear witness with your spirit that you are a child of God?” (Wesley’s Journal, 2.7.1776).  For all his learning, for all his holy practice, John realized that his fear of death conveyed that something major was missing from his faith.  At the end of the day, his assurance was based more on his own beliefs and actions than on a meaningful relationship with the living God.

The Pre-Election Tempest

This week’s comic marks my reflections on the tempest in American politics as we are less than a week away from some big elections.  In these times, my life feels less stable, like anything could change, everything could change, or nothing could change.  While this is stressful for everyone, it seems to have an even more damaging effect on those who are already most at risk of instability in our society.  Instead of simply retelling John Wesley’s story in today’s comic, I decided to place myself on that boat, and imagine Spangenberg’s query directed at me.

“Does the Spirit of God bear witness with your spirit that you are a child of God?”

Yes, in fact, I do rest in that assurance.  Sometimes it feels like the only assurance I CAN trust.  And so, clinging tightly to that one thing, I recognize that the storm in this country is absolutely making me sea-sick.  I can have assurance in Christ AND be stricken by the grief of the reality of this world.  I can trust in God’s love AND be horrified at the words and actions of those who claim to serve God.  I can be a gay Christian, proud of who God has made me to be, AND realistic about the real harm many in society, church, and politics wish to inflict either by ambivalence or outright antagonism.

Next week will bring much pain.  No matter the outcome, and there are some outcomes much worse than others, I anticipate the need for space to lament and grieve that though there is much good, yet there is also much wrong with this world.

May you find communities of peace in times of storm.  May you find rest in the assurance that God calls you beloved, no matter how many times you’ve heard otherwise.  Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.